The Loving Way. . . . In Harmony with Nature

 

Birth Stories & Testimonials

 

The Paredes Family
A Hospital Birth		 Lorne Cambell, M.D.
A Physician's Story
Kristine Lauria
A Midwife's Story		 A Letter to my Daughter

Nicole and Tania

A Hospital Birth with Maggie and Yoly as Doulas

 Home Birth       Jocelyn & Gil

 

 

My Birthstory

By Monique Torres-Paredes

This time around (my second pregnancy) I wanted everything to be different. Starting with the pregnancy, the childbirth preparation and of course the experience itself. Why? Well, because with my first child, a beautiful baby girl that is now nine years old, it was a horrific experience: Forty hours of extremely painful labor, no support from the hospital staff and a fourth degree tear that required forty-five stitches. Recovery: eight months.

I promised myself that if I ever had children again, it would have to be better than that. So I did my homework and started researching all of the "alternative" childbirth classes and pain management. I didn't have an Epidural during my first delivery and I didn't want one with my second either. There had to be something "natural" to help reduce the pain and, yes, the fear!

Well after all my research I found that HYPNOBIRTHING was an up and coming way of preparing for childbirth. The more I read of what it's all about, the more it seemed right for me. My very supportive husband agreed and I proceeded to contact my HypnoBirthing Practitioner, Gisela Mitsu-Llorens. As it will later reveal, this was one of my best decisions.

The sessions, one-on-one or as a group, whichever you prefer, where very warm and left us with tranquility and reassurance, and, in my case more closeness to each other. As Gisela taught us everything from putting ourselves into hypnosis to letting go of our prior fears and negative thoughts, I saw my husband (a real macho) ever more understanding and involved, even enjoying to be able to be so deeply relaxed. This was so wonderful…What if my birthing would go so calmly and would be so fulfilling?

Well it did… After weeks of this serene preparations and letting go of all fears, which causes tension, which in turn cause pain, also called the FTP syndrome, I was ready to birth my baby. I opted for a hospital birth, because it makes me feel more comfortable, but a home birth would have been safe as well. As my due date was approaching (October 7th, 2001) I grew happier each day in anticipation to give life to the growing baby inside of me. Since my first baby was forty-two weeks gestation, I was told to expect about the same two-week delay here.

We proved them wrong…

On Tuesday, September 18, 2001, after a long day at work, I started feeling differently as the day progressed. I ran those last important errands that evening, like knowing that this was the night… I was so "in tune" with my own body!

At about 10:30pm that evening, when I was finally in bed, my water broke as I lay there peacefully. I told my husband and we slowly began to prepare for the journey to the hospital. As he picked up a couple of last things and placed them in my prepared bag, I took a long, hot shower. Then I called Dr. Brooks, my OB/GYN, who was also very supportive of my HypnoBirthing. He wouldn't believe that I was in labor - two weeks early! But since my water had broken he asked me to go to the hospital.

We arrived at the hospital about an hour after my membranes had ruptured. The nurse took me to a private LDR room and did a pelvic exam. I was 3cm dilated! The surges started getting very strong when I was about 6cm dilated. They were also very productive and everything went consequently fast. The only way, I guess, that I can describe it: It was fast but very intense, yet beautiful.

My husband was reading the affirmations to me, as well as the Father's Script as I listened to some music by Enya. I felt incredibly comfortable there with him by my side. As I said before, it went so fast that my doctor almost didn't get there on time. When Dr. Brooks walked in, I had been complete (10cm) for a while and I had started breathing my baby down, while visualizing his birth. After that it really only took about four or five pushes.

Our beautiful and healthy son, Marcelo Daniel Paredes was born on September 19, 2001 at 3:37am, after only five hours of labor. He weighed in at 7lbs. 7 oz and was 20 inches long. The only setback was that I had a tear that required twenty-five stitches. But I gladly accept this, considering my prior childbirth experience opposed to the wonderful and satisfying birthing I had this time.

Appreciation

At this point I want to thank Marie F. Mongan for initiating HypnoBirthing for all women in this world. A special appreciation goes to Gisela Mitsu Llorens for carrying out the important mission of teaching us the philosophy of hypnotherapy, and providing us with an opportunity to make a difference in the greatest celebration of life: childbirth.

Without doubt, the utmost thanks goes to my husband, Eddie, for his endless love and support. This goes beyond birthing companion - without him there wouldn't be a happy me, neither our son.

Dedication

To a very special person, my obstetrician Dr. Darryl C. Brooks, who was there for me in the past four years with a friendly smile and words of encouragement. He took care of me during my pregnancy and helped deliver my son on 09/19/2001 and sadly passed away very sudden a month later, on October 17, 2001. I am very much touched by his passing. He will never be forgotten.

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Letter from Dr. Campbell

 

December 12, 2001

To Whom It May Concern:

I began delivering babies in 1983. I believed in the use of drugs to manage obstetrical pain. I saw lots of complications including babies with compromised breathing in spite of my best efforts to use good sound medical judgment. I believed that Epidurals were a medical blessing. I had a 25% C-Section rate.

Patients demanded natural births. I then performed hundreds of deliveries using the pushing, blowing and holding off analgesics until the mother could no longer take the pain. I saw babies that were no longer respiratorily compromised but were exhausted and quite often needed respiratory support with oxygen. But my C-Section rate had fallen to 5%..

Next I used visual imagery to manage pain. I Occasionally still had to use narcotics and a rare epidural. I still saw exhausted babies who were not fully able to bond. I still had a C-Section rate of 5%..

I then began using Hypnosis to manage pain during birth. The results were ok, mothers still had pain; babies were less often compromised and very rarely needed oxygen. I still had a 5% c-section rate.

I have made the transition to HypnoBirthing. I now believe that birthing involves no pain. I have attended over 100 births that have been HypnoBirths. I realize that I no longer perform deliveries; I attend births and observe the birthing companion receive the baby. It is as if my new role is to be present to witness the miracle of HypnoBirthing.

Every mother has been excited about the birth event. Support people become involved in a meaningful way. I have had no complications. No babies have needed Oxygen or any support other than warming by mother’s body. My C-Section rate is 1. That was very early and she was a VBAC (Vaginal Birth After Cesarean-section). I have given absolutely no analgesic drugs since I have used HypnoBirthing with mothers.

I routinely lecture to medical groups about HypnoBirthing. I am more than happy to talk to any Health Care Professionals (or anyone else) about my experiences with truly natural birthing. I have a number of patients and Husbands who love to talk about their experience. In the near future I will be training residents to use HypnoBirthing as an option for patients.

I am a Clinical Professor of Family Medicine at the State University of New York at Buffalo School of Medicine. I am also an Assistant Clinical professor of Family Medicine at the
University of Rochester School of Medicine.

Sincerely, 

Lorne R. Campbell Sr. M.D.
3 Tountas Ave
Leroy NY 14482
585 768 2620

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Kristine Lauria, Midwife

I have been attending births as a midwife for over 12 years.  During that time I have attended primarily homebirths which in general are much more peaceful and gentle than hospital births.  I became trained in water birth as well and found that to be even more peaceful and gentle still.

I became a C.Ht. and started doing hypnosis with my birth clients prenatally in order to reduce the amount of complications and the length of labor, which I was tremendously successful with.  I rarely had a transfer or a complication.  I was not yet aware of HypnoBirthing®.

I discovered HypnoBirthing® before the birth of my own child and taught myself the method from the book and tapes because I could not take a class (I was living in Central America at the time).

My biggest fear was that I would have the baby quickly as my mother and sister had with theirs and I did not want to do that because after having practiced midwifery for over 10 years I really wanted to "experience" birth and was not intent on getting it done quickly - I wanted time to enjoy it.

When I tell other women this they think I am crazy!

So my birth began on Tuesday and I went about my work in my birth center with clients because the uterus was doing its job and not needing me for anything yet.  Later that evening after getting home I prepared my birth supplies and got my birth pool ready because I knew I wanted to be in the pool for some of the birth at least.  Hours passed and I finally filled the pool and got in.  It was so relaxing.  I just listened to music and breathed and occasionally would stand up and sway with the music - that is my favorite memory of that time in the birth.

I do not have any memory of all the hours I was having the surges – they are like a fog. I had no one with me so there was nothing to stimulate my neocortex and bring me out of my self.  My membranes released in the morning and the surges kept on throughout the day because I did not feel I could give birth in daylight - I knew I would wait until night came again - and I did.  When I finally felt my baby move down the birth path I had tremendous pressure. With each surge these primal, guttural noises came out as I breathed him down to my perineum.  I guided his head out with my hands and then waited for the next surge to come.  Once it came he came floating out into the water and I reached down for him and pulled him to me.

It was more than 10 minutes before the cord was done pulsating and I went to tie it off and saw that it was a boy.  The Rachmaninof Rhapsody was playing as he was born and this music still delights him today. I was so profoundly touched by my birth experience, which I consider birth in its purest form, that when I came back to the U.S. I became certified to teach HypnoBirthing.

I have since started teaching women HypnoBirthing®.  Most of these women have their babies at home so unfortunately the hospitals aren't being exposed to it.  But the mothers are happy and have such positive and empowering experiences free from fear.  My hope is that I can help many more women give birth joyfully and that they feel the tremendous empowerment that birth is meant to be.

I am happy to provide any testimonial that anyone needs or wants.

Blessings,

Kristine Lauria

 

 

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“Letter to my Daughter” by Flavia Goncalves

Praising and mirroring the actions of women who are rupturing tradition, transforming taboos, or just simply excelling in their fields, helps us lay a foundation for a better, more respectful world for our daughters. The problem is that on the individual level, many women don’t believe they possess what it takes to be a role model. I, for one, was one of them.

 Unique women are unique because they believe in what they stand for. If I can get this message across to my daughter alone, I will consider my job done.

***

Dear baby girl,

Your name is Luma. It comes from the Latin word lumen, and it means light, illuminated, sparkle of life. Where I am from, to give birth (“dar a luz”) means to give life. However, in our case, I believe it happened the other way around. In the miraculous moment of your birth, I was truly born.

I learned that you were growing inside me a few days before Christmas. Although I do not observe any particular religious faith, I believe that you were sent to me as a gift. The motherly instincts I didn’t imagine I had surfaced immediately; you became my reason to be.

The first time I heard your heart beat, I shivered with emotion. When I saw you on the first sonogram, I cried. I was in a constant state of joy. My belly grew bigger as you grew inside me. I remember one particular night, when I was lying in bed reading; you suddenly slid your little foot across my belly. I placed my hand where I had felt you and you kicked again. We had discovered a game which we played quite often, for you were a very active baby. The more my belly grew the happier and prettier I felt.

Other than being very sleepy in the beginning and at the final months, the pregnancy itself was an easy one. Given that I was feeling good and everything seemed to be going well, your father and I asked the doctor about our chances of having a natural birth. The doctor was very supportive. He agreed that I was having a normal and healthy pregnancy and our chances of a successful natural birth were high.

Labor pain? Yes, I did think about it. I guess this issue crosses the mind of every single pregnant woman. It will probably cross yours too someday. Fear of pain. There was nothing I could do about the pain, but there was something I could do about fear and so I did. I found a hypnobirthing coach and I followed her instructions diligently, every day, many times a day. I knew she could help me.

Hypnobirthing, or Hypnosis, is nothing more than a deep state of concentration. I practiced meditation and relaxation. I repeated my affirmations (a long list of beliefs) morning, afternoon and evening. I worked on slow long deep breaths. My confidence grew stronger every single day and the fear vanished.

I was met with skepticism and disapproval from several friends and family. First, several people didn’t know what hypnosis was all about and were skeptical of me trying it. Second, my birth choice caused alarm; after all, c-sections in Miami are expected by most. Miami’s c-section rates are among the highest in the USA and the developed countries. Friends and family from Sao Paulo also were puzzled. C-section rates there are the highest in the world! To my disappointment, some people tried to discourage me by describing horrible birth stories; others would just say that I would never be able to withstand the pain, that I just would not be able to do it. The truth is, Luma, that I did not know. I couldn’t know what the outcome would be. But I didn’t get discouraged.

At this point, you must be thinking how brave and courageous your mommy is, but I wasn’t. This is where you come in. During my entire life, I rarely took credit for my successes, or believed in my capabilities, and worse yet, several times I didn’t stand up for myself when I should have. But in this case, I was doing it for you. Without blinking, I would do it a thousand times for you. The new me had been conceived. A world of possibilities opened up to me.

While my doctor was genuinely supportive of my birth choice, I found out too late that his practice colleagues were not as agreeable. Therefore, I decided to change doctors. Because the pregnancy was very advanced, no other practice risked taking me in. I was disappointed, of course, but still determined. So I took a leap of faith. You were already thirty-six weeks old when I left the practice.

I put you and myself into the care of Miriam, our midwife. I felt an immediate relief the minute I stepped in the Maternity Center. Miriam was nurturing, calm, and never condescending. She empathized with my situation and was willing to help me, even if that meant finding another doctor. Miriam just felt right and I stuck with her. To make matters even better, Miriam offered water births, an option that was very attractive to me.

You were forty and a half weeks old, in position and very low, but still pretty comfortable inside. To help you, I went on long walks, scrubbed the bath tub, and swam every day. Until one day my laps in the pool were interrupted by this tightening on my belly, that wouldn’t stop. Calmly, I told your dad, who was swimming next lane over, that time had arrived. We went home, I took a long shower, your grandma gathered things we needed to take, and after Miriam checked my progress we all went to the Maternity Center.

The ambiance of our room at the Birthing Center was perfect: it was calm, soothing music played, the lights were dimmed, and there were few candles flickering. I sat in bed and concentrated on slow long breaths and pretty soon I fell asleep. Yes, I fell asleep. When I finally woke up, the contractions were almost back to back and very intense. It was time to get into the water and just as I did I felt a difference.

I was really aware of my body and you and the changes that were quickly taking place. Nonetheless, I lost notion of time. During the breaks between contractions, I relaxed so much that I would fall into a deep sleep and even have dreams. Grandma held my head while I drifted off. Your father was my link to a regular state of consciousness; he kept me hydrated; he caressed my belly. I never felt pain, except for a couple of times when I had to pipi, first, because the power of gravity outside of the water was tremendous, second, because, I couldn’t concentrate on the surges and do pipi at the same time. Otherwise, things were happening as I pictured they would.

When I felt it was time I asked your dad to fetch Miriam. Your grandma had already positioned herself, my back towards her; she held my head and caressed my hair. Now your dad plunged into the water in front of me. He described the evolution of your birth, his voice trembled with ecstasy. Sometimes emotion took over him and all he could say was, “Oh, my God, Oh my God!” His happiness and pride strengthened me. Miriam was also a key person, as a hypnobirthing coach herself, she knew when I was losing concentration and would bring me right back. We all worked together.

When you were ready to come out, your dad’s hands were there to hold you. Then he placed you on my chest. I never knew I could love so much. While I was holding and looking at you mesmerized, your grandma whispered in my ear, “You and your daughter were born at exactly the same hour: 4:10am.” I smiled at the coincidence and thought to myself that you had given me a second chance to actually live. I was proud! I was so proud and happy.

If I had to put in just a few words what your birth experience felt like, I would say that it was the most intense physical and spiritual experience I have ever lived. Such an empowering experience still resonates. I am a different person. I live life to the fullest. I invite challenge, I face my fears, and I take advantage of opportunities. I am still human, though. Sometimes I am scared, sometimes I fail, and sometimes I make mistakes. So forgive me, because I will fail you. I will make mistakes, but I promise to always love you. I promise that I will work everyday to be a better and stronger person than I was yesterday. I promise to be a role model to you, so you can grow up as a strong, confident woman. I promise to live my dreams, because I want you to live yours.

Love always,
Mom.

My story is an account of what we can do or what we can become if we truly believe in ourselves. It describes what happens when we free ourselves from outside judgment and pre-conceived beliefs. In my case, believing in me has caused a chain-reaction of self accomplishments. After birthing my daughter naturally, in the water and without pain, when many around me considered it impossible, I engaged in many other challenging activities. I started running and became a marathon runner and a triathlete. Currently I am training for a half ironman (a 1.2 mile swim, a 56 mile bike ride, and a 13.1 run event). I also went back to school and took up art classes. I plan to flourish in the art world. Lastly, after twenty years I started writing again.

 

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Our home birth experience was wonderful. I had been having lots of practice surges off and on for several days prior to the birth. The morning of the birth, I had been having very strong surges with lots of pressure for a couple of hours, but they stopped. Mary and Cauley, the midwives, came over that afternoon because I had been dilated to almost 2 centimeters and 60 percent effaced at my last check up. Mary was concerned that things were going to go rather quickly once I did go into active labor and wanted to check for more cervical change. When she arrived at 5:30, I was dilated to almost 4 centimeters and 80 percent effaced but the surges had lagged. Gil and I were instructed to do lots of hugging and making out and to go for a nice walk. We did. The surges began at about 8:00 that evening. They were 4 minutes apart...lots of pressure. WE walked for about an hour and a half off and on. By 10:30, they were less than 2 minutes apart and VERY intense. For the most part, the surges were quite manageable until the last 20 minutes or so. As it turns out, my son decided to bring his right hand with him against his cheek. This put his elbow right into my lower back. Not comfortable...to say the very least. It was at this point that my husband had to remind me of what you had said in class about that time when women tend to feel like giving up. You were absolutely right. No sooner had I uttered the words "I don't know how much longer I can do this," when I felt my body take over and begin to "push." Three good pushes and out came Wyatt, right into Gil's loving arms. It was amazing.

I cannot say enough about my Mary and Cauley. They were phenomenal. Not once, was I told what to do. No one poked or prodded me during my labor. They truly left us alone until they could tell from my noises that the baby was close. When it was time for them to be present, they remained close, but spoke very little and always whispered, so very respectful of the work I was doing. The baby was not pulled from my body; he simply came out, all on his own. My membranes were not ruptured to speed things along; they released as the baby emerged. Unfortunately, the cord had to be clamped right away because it was short and tore a little during the birth, causing bleeding. When either of the women had reason to handle the baby, it was done gently and with kindness. The baby didn't even cry until his newborn check, which was done an hour later. Wyatt weighed in at 8 lbs. and was 20 inches long. Mary and Cauley (the midwives) were outstanding. They fed me, helped me bathe, and even threw in a load of laundry before they left. Truly wonderful people.

The whole experience was phenomenal. I would recommend a home birth with Mary to anyone. I am sure that the HypnoBirthing is what made the first two and a half hours of my labor so manageable and comfortable. I am not sure that anything could have made the elbow in my back comfortable! Anyhow, that's my story.

Thank you, Gisela, for a wonderful class. I don't plan to have any more children, but if I were, I would definitely take your class again.

Best wishes,

Jocelyn  2008

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